AIRING OF GRIEVANCES

AKA Harsh Truths and Rules of Life According to Me… randomly updated depending on my frustrations and how many ignorant people I run into.
Written with the perspective of a monogamous heterosexual cis woman. I encourage everyone to make a list like this. It’s cathartic.

MOVING TO A NEW CITY WHERE YOU KNOW ZERO PEOPLE

  • Only do this if you are strong, resilient, love alone time, have great social skills or if you know everyone in the new city (which isn’t possible based on the rules of this segment).

DATING

  • When a man asks a lady to go out with you, be ready with a plan. Nothing is less sexy than a man without a plan.

  • Be on time. It shows you respect the other person… and yourself.

  • If you offer the lady the option of making a few suggestions of what you do for your date and she sends you a few restaurants to choose from, please select one of the options she presented unless you have a valid reason not to choose said option (as in - you were literally just there a few nights ago / they don’t offer menu options you can eat / the head server is your psycho ex, etc)

  • Don’t video record anyone without asking their permission. Especially inside a bedroom.

  • Ghosting is rude. Be kind enough to say you’re not interested or you’re more interested in someone else… or whatever the reason may be (or not be). Just don’t disappear on someone.

  • Don’t assume the other person will pay. Always offer and one of you can definitely insist more… and if neither of you do insist on paying for everything, then splitting is totally cool. If someone insists, let them pay… they want to treat you and that’s really neat. We don’t live in a time when ladies don’t have money and “need” a man to support us. I’m all about certain gender roles and love a man who likes to lead, but I also am a self-sufficient woman who makes money… so, I can pay too.

  • Trust your instincts!! They are usually right. If you aren’t excited to hear from someone… don’t go out with them again. If you don’t jump at the chance to respond or reach out, they aren’t for you. Trust that gut of yours!

  • Two drinks max on first dates. Trust me.

  • Be 100% authentically YOU! How will they know if they truly like you if you aren’t being true to who you are? Don’t try to be what they want… just be you and you’ll attract someone who appreciates and wants what you have to offer.

DIETING

  • Never shame me (or any woman) for drinking her allotted amount of daily wine. You don’t know what she’s dealing with or what she’s giving up in order to make that her guilty pleasure.

  • “Dieting” should be cancelled. Completely. Intuitive eating while considering the vitamins and minerals you need to survive should be the route all humans take.

  • Eating shit food and then taking a vitamin does not count as being “healthy”.

  • Drink water, dumb ass. And, lots of it!

  • Stop eating processed foods!!!! If you can’t grow it out of the ground or it didn’t previously have breath… eat it VERY infrequently. And, food “bars” may be convenient, but they aren’t the answer… check your labels!

  • Shop 90% of your foods from the perimeter of the grocery store. (produce, meats, dairies, eggs)

COMMON SENSE

  • DO NOT refer to women as “females”. It’s the ultimate objectification. You never hear woman say, “Damn, that male is hot!” or “When I hang out with a male, I always treat him well.” Nope. A big ol’ nope. Don’t do it.

  • Be kind. Even when someone is rude to you. Maybe they just found out their family member passed away or maybe they just lost a ton of money on Bitcoin (we all know this feeling) or maybe they just stepped in dog shit and they can’t let it go. Regardless of why, just don’t respond in hate. I mean… put them in their place in a direct way, but still with kindness in your heart.

DRIVING

  • Blinkers are not only important, but it’s driving school 101. Use them. In advance.

  • Giving the middle finger is tacky. Give a thumbs down instead… insult, injury, AND disappointment all in one.

  • Horns are there for a reason, but use with caution and grace.

RELATIONSHIPS

  • Have your own life. This is crucial!! Yes, you love each other, but you are not his world and neither is he yours.

  • Don’t lie.

  • Don’t omit… especially if you know the omitted information would be hurtful, questionable, or could potentially cause a problem. Don’t be a coward… hit that shit head on!

KIDS (OR MORE SO, ADULTS WHO OWN CHILDREN)

(No, I don’t have kids, but I’ve spent my entire life around them and have seen a thing or two in my 15 years of watching families interact during photo shoots.)

  • Don’t assume everyone loves your kid. Better yet… assume everyone is neutral or highly annoyed by your kids at all times and when they aren’t, be pleasantly surprised.

  • Let your kid answer the questions adults shoot their way. (i.e. don’t answer for your child) It teaches them to be confident, respectful and how to behave like an actual human.

  • Bribery only teaches kids that you should do something only if there is something in it for you. Instead, teach them that they should do something because it’s the right thing to do. I know it’s harder, but it creates better humans.

LAST UPDATED: 3/5/26